New York Housewife Dis-‘Count’-ed

The clothes, the jewelry, the botox, the self-imposed detachment from reality - our favorite reality show car crash, Real Housewives of New York City, certainly has it all. But fasten your diamond-clad seat belts - the juicy dish just got a whole lot dish-ier.

While all of the cast members – from Fran Drescher incarnate, Jill Zarin, to the social climbing ex-model, Kellie Killoren Bensimon – inspire my wrath on every episode, no one makes my eyes roll harder than LuAnn de Lesseps. Otherwise known as – The Countess.

For those of you who are blissfully unaware, The Countess takes great pride in being the Miss Manners of Manhattan – throwing her title around like it’s a one-way ticket to her own fiefdom. If her upcoming book title, “Class With The Countess” doesn’t give you enough of a picture, her overbearing and misguided etiquette lessons to anyone within earshot surely will.

The truth is, The Countess was originally a (gasp) commoner, who married in to her title. Her husband, the Count de Lesseps, has always been a fleeting presence on the show – dashing off to do ‘count-like’ things in Europe and the like leaving LuAnn to scoff at the help on her own.

But soon after celebrating her 16th wedding anniversary on March 16th, The Countess got the news (by email no less!) that her one-way ticket to the ‘other half’ decided that taking up with an Ethiopian woman in Geneva was more fun than being LuAnn’s ‘better half’ – leaving her stunned and – for once - at a loss for words.

A source told Page Six, “LuAnn was blindsided. She was just devastated. They have basically lived apart for many years — he lives in Europe and comes and goes as he pleases, but she never thought this would happen. "

I wonder if there is a chapter in her book on the graceful way to milk your husband for millions?

Equally as gauche is the recent court case surrounding housewife, Kellie, who while she isn’t spending her waking hours making sure her cast-mates know she’s well 'above' them, is apparently punching her boyfriend in the face. Oh, and designing jewelry.

I found this link to her small jewelry line that debuted last year on Owl's Lab. The imaginative collection is a series of…you guessed it…owl styles that are actually kindof a 'hoot' (sorry).

The Real Housewives of New York airs Tuesdays on Bravo! at 10pm.